Speaking to Inspire

Murray is one of the inspirational speakers at Destiny Banquet Hall in Woodbridge this Sunday. His title is ‘Finding Serenity Avenue.’ He tells his story of being hospitalized with anxiety, returning from the hospital in the same condition (along with memory loss), and finding the cure in his study of spirituality. If you are a woman wanting empowerment, consider coming to this all-day event. More information can be found at http://affordaclassyevent.com/.

Place: 4220 Steeles Ave. W. Woodbridge ON
Date: Sunday, June 22, 2014
Time: 9:30-3:00
Cost: $60 (includes breakfast, a hot buffet lunch, plus take-home value for all aspects of your life)

My Next Speech: Ways to Reduce Fear in Public Speaking

Thursday April 14, 2011 — 6:00 p.m.

Jane/Sheppard branch of the Toronto Public Library (1906 Sheppard Ave W)

Standing up to speak in public tops the average person’s list of ‘Life’s Most Dreaded Activities.’ It certainly did for me — for much of my life. My childhood dream was also my worst nightmare! Yet, statistics also reveal that oral communication skill is a reliable indicator of success in work and joy in life.

Now I’m an award-winning inspirational speaker. My two most popular speeches are ‘If Only Sleep Would Last Forever’ (a presentation on depression and also the title of my second book) and ‘Ways to Reduce Fear in Public Speaking.’ How did I go from nearly falling flat on my face from fear to a confident coach? My answer to that question is very encouraging for anyone struggling to put a speech together and to make their butterflies ‘fly in formation.’

I heard many positive comments from teachers of each grade and you certainly inspired many young speakers. Many students, directly after your speech, were very keen to work on and improve their speeches. I personally enjoyed your speech very much and really appreciated the connections you drew to the community and our school. Thank you again and again.

Do you recall your very first school speech or ‘oral composition’? Mine was at Norwood District High School when I was 13 and in grade nine.   I wasn’t nervous — I was scared stiff! Since then, I’ve learned I was not alone. Standing up to speak in front of others tops the average person’s list of ‘Life’s Most Dreaded Activities.’ Yet, statistics also reveal that oral communication skill is one of the most reliable indicators of success in work and joy in life.

Now, I give speeches in schools — voluntarily! My topic is ‘Ways to Reduce Fear in Public Speaking.’ How did I go from a frozen failure to a confident coach? My answer to that question is very encouraging for students struggling with how to put a speech together and make their butterflies ‘fly in formation.’

Most of our fears seem to boil down to three questions: Will they like me? Will they be interested in what I have to say? Will they be able to hear me over the sound of my hammering heart and knocking knees? I share a simple system which can help any confused or fearful individual cut the clutter and become a more confident communicator. And it will produce a ‘yes’ answer to those three questions.

Last winter a teacher at St. Paul’s Elementary School in Norwood, Ontario, contacted my speaking club for an experienced speaker to address the students a few weeks prior to their public speaking contest. When my club recommended me (I’m an Advanced Communicator Silver Toastmaster), I had the privilege of meeting the event-planner. Following is part of what she wrote to me in an e-mail following my presentation:

I heard many positive comments from teachers of each grade and you certainly inspired many young speakers. Many students, directly after your speech, were very keen to work on and improve their speeches. I personally enjoyed your speech very much and really appreciated the connections you drew to the community and our school. Thank you again and again.

I was not always an award-winning speaker. Although standing and delivering inspirational speeches to groups of adults was my childhood dream, it was also my worst nightmare! But my nightmare became my dream-come-true when I learned three secrets. These secrets relate to how to ‘see’ your audience members,  how to pick a topic, and how to write and deliver your speech in three simple parts.

Ever fall flat on your face from fear! If not, count your blessings. But you won’t have to look far to find such individuals. Hiding in school classrooms from one corner of this country to another are students just like me — once tongue-tied and terrified, afraid of failing and of looking stupid in front of others. Individuals who wish to do their best, but simply need a little help from someone who’s been there, and wants to be there for someone else, and is willing to share some special know-how. If it worked for me, it can work for anyone.

That’s why I’m calling all teachers in charge of public speaking contests. If you would like me to help, feel free to contact me.

A retired teacher, Murray is an author and speaker whose topics in front of school (and other) audiences include ‘Down with Depression’ and ‘Ways to Reduce Fear in Public Speaking.’

‘Adam Had a Garden’ is the title of my upcoming speech to The Warkworth Service Club in the village of Warkworth, Ontario. The club, apparently one of the largest for a small community, is holding its Dinner-Business meeting at St. Paul’s United Church on the evening of November 18.

For me as a speaker, one thing will be the same but in other ways it will be a new venture. What will be the same? My use of a lectern and notes — because of my brain-memory damage. My short-term memory problem was one of several conditions that followed my being prescribed four strong drugs when I was admitted, during the summer holidays in1993, to the psychiatric wing of a Toronto hospital with major depression.

What will be new? Several things including my speech topic, age of audience and time of day. As for time, this speech will be sandwiched (pun intended) between a dinner at 6:30 and a business meeting at 7:30. Most of my speeches are delivered in the morning or afternoon. My presentation this year at St. Paul’s Elementary School in Norwood was in the morning before first recess. My two speeches at Norwood District High School were in the afternoon. When I’m not in schools, meeting time is usually in the evening, one example being my speech this year at The Toronto Public Library.

As for age, this audience will be adults only. Usually I’m in front of mainly teenage students with a few teachers. At the elementary school in Norwood, referred to above, the pupils ranged in age from nine to twelve, grade four to eight. At the high school in Norwood (I seem to like Norwood!), the students were the 13 to 14-year-old grade nines and the 16 to 17-year-old grade twelves.

It was a real joy to be with these audiences. I make it a practice to hand out a feedback form at the end of nearly all my presentations. What a lovely surprise it was to have every student hand in a completed form. One student wrote, “It wasn’t a speech by someone who didn’t actually know what it is to be depressed…and how to fix it.”

The third novelty will be my speech topic. In this case, ‘Adam Had a Garden’ is an intentionally humorous speech. I say ‘intentionally’ because even in my speeches on depression, there are lots of laughs.

When I stand in front of secondary students, the topic is usually the teen version of Down with Depression, in which I deal with the connection between teenage depression and suicide. At The Toronto Public Library, where the youngest audience member was 18, I delivered the adult version of this same speech. In both places, I drew on my own experience and from my latest-published book — If Only Sleep Would Last Forever: Help for Depression and Anxiety from One Who’s Been There. Different speeches obviously allow a speaker to serve different needs in the audiences. My original intention was to deliver that same speech on depression to the Service club. Also on my short list were The Private and the President (Abraham Lincoln), In the Land of Nod (on dreams), and my short story ‘The Wheelbarrow.’ But Adam Had a Garden seemed to rise to the top.

In front of elementary students, the topic is usually ‘Ways to Reduce Fear in Public Speaking.’ Which is rather ironic when you understand that when I gave my very first speech, which was at NDHS (you guessed it — Norwood District High School!), I fell flat on my face. In fact, for most of my life, speaking in front of others topped my list of Life’s Most Dreaded Activities. Yet, at the same time, it was my childhood dream.

Back then, I was a fearful, shy, and self-conscious little know-nothing from a little farm, having to stand up in front of a teacher (!) and peers who I saw as mainly confident, sophisticated city-slickers. What my topic was I don’t recall. What I do recall were my tied tongue, knocking knees, and that I never wanted to do it again.

Now, I see my audience members as duplicates of myself, each having some problem, needing some help. I see myself taking to my neighbours a tool of vital importance, that they really need but don’t have, and only I can give them. What I offer to share are smiles, wisdom and encouragement. Which helps me perspire a little less and maybe inspire a little more.

As a person who spent his first few weeks of life in SickKids Hospital with digestive problems, who was extremely shy, who has sleep apnea and gluten intolerance, who ended up in the psychiatric ward with major depression, who needs notes and a lectern to offset his memory damage, I consider myself privileged to stand in front of audiences of individuals like myself — individuals having some problem and needing some help — and maybe inspire one of them to overcome.

The good folks at The Warkworth Service Club may not take home any extra wisdom from ‘Adam Had a Garden,’ but they may leave with a few smiles and a little encouragement, if they have a heart — and a funnybone.

Murray C. Watson